By: mark gassler

April 23

looks like I won the sick rossignol board. thanks snowboarder mag and rossignol for the sweet new deck! can't wait to shred on it

By: Anthony

March 13

Strap off, jump on to the bear, grab his brain with my hands(luckly i have gloves on so no bear brain under the nails later) and eat his brain! KABOOOOM DEADBEAR! xD

By: Jeff Kimball

March 4

I'd simply pull out some honey have a good sit down sesh and let the bear leave fat and happy with a bear hug

By: Chris G

March 3

Who won this board?

By: Finn Clark

February 28

I would get Torstein Horgmo to do a triple cork right in front of his face, and when he fainted from amazement leave a buisness card in his mouth saying. 'You just got Horgmoed '

By: AJ Sanders

February 27

I would jump on the bear's back and ride him like a pbr and then sit down and eat a bowl of honey nut cheerios with him, give him a hug, and walk away.

By: connie

February 24

Love the board and so does my 13 year old grandson..he is a whack on a board:)

By: JP Melencio

February 24

I would look for the closest girl with golden locks and use her as an escape plan.

By: Marcelo

February 23

I would grab my snowboard and trick him between the trees while riding some powder, to have fun, and the bear would be so focused on me that... BANG head into a tree.

By: Angela Zhou

February 21

To scare off a bear, I would try to get really tall and look strong and stuff. I would back away slowly and thrown fire at it. Then, I would run away really fast screaming and throwing fire...I might burn down the forest...but at least I would be safe :)

By: Spenser Chakerian

February 21

How would I escape? I would start shreding the knarliest of pow. my shrdetastic skills would indefinatly start an avalanche. I would ride through the avalanche using my Snow air bag and laugh as the bear was trampled by the onslaught of ice and snow!!

By: Brandon spada

February 20

I would scare a bear many ways. One way I would scare one is to show it a picture of chuck norris. Everybody is scared of him. I'll get to the real part now. I would scare one by screaming on a mountain. This would cause an avalanche and the bear would run away. That is how I would scare a bear.

By: cam mcdougall

February 20

i'd scare him with frozen mac and cheese then run like hell

By: Richard Kemble

February 20

We would just hug it out. But if that fails.. ADOPT THE FETAL POSITION

By: Scott M

February 17

I'd give him my picnic basket. If that didn't work I'd throw a bottle of honey past the bear & play dead... Hopefully allowing me the opportunity to ride this sweet looking snowboard!

By: justin R

February 17

When I have encountered them here in Montana, I have they do like GU energy gels. If I had a weapon to fend them off, it would be a huge knife like Crocodile Dundee's. Thats one badass dude!!!!!

By: Nicholas Nohava

February 17

I'd punch him in the face and it would drop dead. The end.

By: Henry

February 17

Stepo numero uno: Get some footage of the bear saying, "when im not mauling humans like crazy, im on snowboardermag.com Step number b: uhh Run like frickin Crayzay and get the helll outa there.

By: Hayden Mactavish

February 17

id jib the fucking bear.... id be working on my mj's

By: Emily N.

February 17

Step 1: Panick and scream at the top of my lungs. Step 2: Use pepper spray and whack the bear with a snowboard. Step 3: Run away and climb up a tree.

By: Josh H.

February 17

I would turn around and fight the bear....give her a whack with my boss rossignol snowboard....then i would ride down the mountain carrying the dead bear on my shoulders then defibrilate it to bring it back to life just to kill it once more...all in a days work

By: Kathina Ax

February 17

I would swear to the scare of seeing a bear. Out of nowhere and no prepare.. There i would stare in bare despair and prepare to tear my hair.. I forget i'm standing on a bear and totally unaware that this is a feeling we share, Me and the Bear.

By: newbrough

February 17

i would start singing "my heart will go on" from the movie 'titanic' as loud as i could. bears absolutely hate celine dion.

By: Matt

February 17

fuck bears bro there scary i don't hang around them, im not a flipping idiot, besides the bears couldn't even win a single game without Gay Butler (Jay Cutler, who knows what will happen when Brian Urlacher ^^ gets taken out.

By: Ted Guglielmo

February 17

I'd take out my can of spinach and pop him 'cause i ams what i ams Popeye the sailor man

By: Dan O'Reilly

February 17

There are only two things you need in any dangerous situation. Duct tape and Chuck Norris. I mean this is an easy one guys. You don't have much time, this is a bear and you were just arguing with Chuck Norris about the perefect marshmellow temperature for your smores (obviously brown and sliding off the stick is the only way, it takes patience Chuck Norris, patience). So jump up find two solid sticks. Tape them together. BOOM! Nunchucks, now you have a chance. Pass those bad boys over to Chuck Norris. Watch them do battle for a few minutes before a quick dash for your board and the quickest path down the mountain. Seriously man, its a bear and if Chuck Norris can't take something out you don't want to wait around as desert.

By: Andrew Brown

February 17

How you handle a bear attack depends on the type of bear you encounter. So the first step in surviving a bear attack is to know what kind you’re up against. Grizzlies will stop attacking when they feel there’s no longer a threat so Play dead. If they think you’re dead, they won’t think you’re threatening. Black bears often bluff when attacking. If you show them you mean business, they may just lose interest. Don’t climb a tree. Black bears are excellent climbers. Climbing up a tree won’t help you out here. If the black bear actually attacks, fight back. Use anything and everything as a weapon- rocks, sticks, fists, and your teeth. Aim your blows on the bears face- particularly the eyes and snout. When a black bear sees that their victim is willing to fight to the death, they’ll usually just give up. Disclaimer The Art of Manliness does not encourage people to go out and find a bear to practice these skills with. Practicing on your significant other will not do either.

By: Alice Ewart

February 17

How would I fend off a bear? If in doubt I always think "What would Bear Grylls do?" Although he could fend off a real bear with his bare hands that's not the best idea for a little snowbunny like myself to do. Knowing how Bear Grylls looks can tame me, I would lift up my snowboard and lull him with the bear motif and tame him lady-bear style!

By: Bob

February 16

Hey, Boo Boo! He’s smarter than the average bear so give him the pin-a-nic basket and back away slowly!

By: Andrew Hellinger

February 16

Since the Rossignol Retox Amptek board is decorated with the image of a French Brown Bear, it would be a treat to use the new board in the French Pyrennes. The Brown Bear that lives in the French Pyrennes is now on the decline, so I would try real hard to be understanding. Also, the Brown Bear is mostly vegetarian and is likely hibranating during most of the snowboarding season. However,if I did run into one, I would first blow my bear whistle really loud to scare it off, throw it my bag of trail mix, then take off on my amazingly fast Rossignol Retox Ampek board. I suggest Rossignol donate some part of the sales of the board to the group that is trying to save the Frech Brown Bear. If I win, I will make a donation.

By: Brian Bult

February 16

Look at the bear, now back to me, now back to the bear, now back to me. Sadly he's not going to catch me, but if he stopped using little boy boards and switched to a Rossignol maybe he could catch me. Look down, now up. Where are you? You're on top of a mountain with the board that bear could have caught you on. Whats in your hand? Back at me, I have it. It's the board you just won for making the best comment yet. I'm on a boat.

By: mia

February 16

I think I'd put him on the board and push him down the hill.

By: Algirdas

February 16

So it happens to be that i'm called bear (for my looks). And bears often fight for food or female. And oh boy do i have a georgeos female by my side skiing at that moment when i encounter the bear. Oh he likes her, he really does. So the showdown begins. We groul at each other, we stand up to show how big we are! Oh, thats bad i'm smaller. What to do, what to do? A wild idea jumps in to my head. I run to the nearest tree and peel of a huge chunk of wood and toss it by the rival bears foot. First he looks lost, but then he gets my idea. He stands up on the wood. Growls at me. Challenge exepted. I jump on my snowboard and we start rushing down the hill. We go offcourse. Theres alot of trees. I manage to dodge some. My rival bear is un lucky and hits one. I smile whidly because i think i win the race, but after few moments, the rival bear jumps over me and now hes on the leed!!! I can see my girl down the hill, I Can't Lose!!!! Adrenalin flushes my veins, i dodge some more trees, jump over a frozen river, duck under a fallen log, and and ... I lost.. The bear beated me. Oh the shame... But then, few rangers rushes in and shots some sleeping darts to the bear. I'm saved!!! Close call, huh guys?

By: Anthony Hamilton

February 16

If I encountered a bear it would probably be because I was snowboarding with my new Rossignol Retox Amptek board in its natural habitat. If he charged at me I would quickly unstrap my bindings and show the bear the exact swagged out bear replica of him. He would be so impressed by the graphic of this board that he would then want to start riding it. I would let him ride it but only for one run even though he said he's never snowboarded before. With this imformation the reason why i let him ride the board was because I had faith in the true twin, wood 6420 core that it has. Also it is a intermediate to expert board so im sure this board is able to stomp a bunch of cab double cork 12's over a 80 footer or even just a switch 270 to 270 out of a flat bar. Anyways the bear would go on to stomp some mellow 3s, 5s and then skip up to a triple. the skill the board brings Ill let him keep that board and buy myself about 6 more because i like the board so much. all in all, the bear and I became friends, funny how a snowboard can make a bear go from wanting to eat me, to wanting to shred everyday.....but now the bear is professional and traveling to different countries and wont bring me. He didnt even thank me for the board that got him stomping tricks. :(

By: Matt B

February 16

As this happened while night riding I just pulled out flashlight shining it at the bear to confuse it like a deer in headlights. Next thing I know the bears saying "cmon man im trying to piss here" then I realize its just some weekend warrior in a frickin bear suit thats had a bit too much to drink. And I think I just pissed him off. Time to dip off into the woods.

By: Jessica Dobbs

February 16

I would sick my terrifying 2 year old on 'em. Her resume is quite impressive. She's already beat the boogeyman's arse, some coyotes, and some caimans. She would "boom boom" him with her ab-DOMINALS

By: Eimear

February 15

I'd slap him upside the face with a frozen salmon..

By: greg b

February 15

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pa1pIO4_lUY

By: Andy Leerssen

February 15

I would tell him that I know Ron Burgandy's dog Baxter. And slap it a high five as I dropped in to the supple pillow line that which lead to the bear encounter in the first place. BANGARANG!!!

By: eric donlick

February 15

if i was to encounter a bear in the woods, i would promptly 360 to decapitation.

By: PJ

February 15

If I ran into a bear, I'd probably be in the woods with my boss, so I'd kick him in the shins then run so the bear would catch him first!

By: Oscar Ramirez

February 15

first i would get in the fetal postion and wait to see what it would do. then if it tried having its way with me, i would throw that damn bear toielt paper at it and yell at it for never calling or helping to pay for child support. its also my birthday friday the 17th and a snowboard would be a lovely gift

By: Hailey Harrison

February 15

I would escape a bear encounter by jumping on my snowboard and shooting down the hill, I would assume I'd only find a bear on the mountian I was shredding on!

By: David

February 15

let it OD on sleeping pills and honey

By: Chapple, Chapple

February 15

smoke a bowl with him, wait till he falls asleep and tie him up, take him home smoke him out and train him to snowboard!!!!!!!!!!!

By: Steve P

February 15

I'd kick him in his furry bear dick

By: Justin Gifford

February 15

I'd throw a shark at it.

By: Bjarne Tellekamp

February 15

Basicly I would: - Shit myself in the pants!!!!!!!!! - If he engages kick him in the nuts or slap him in the face with my snowboard. - If that won't work I'd take a grab in my pants and fling my poo in his eyes - If that won't work I'd cry and hope the bear is not interested in poo smeared meat!

By: Daniel Gort

February 14

I'd try to psychokinetically stop the heart of the bear. If it doesn't work, I'll play possum.

By: Matt Vierling

February 14

If I were to encounter a bear I would treat like an average person that I come into contact with. Most likely I would be tearing up on the slopes so in that case I would offer the bear to join me in my adventures. I would then assist him with getting fitted with my for his snowboard gear and teach him the basics of learning to snowboard. As I did I believe he would catch on quickly and we would be having the time of our life. After a long day of riding we may have a few drinks at the bar inside the lodge and talk about the day and what we could do next time. So overall that is how I would treat a bear if I were to encounter it.

By: Christopher DuBose

February 14

What??? If I encountered a bear it would be my homie I wouldn't even try to escape. It'll be like the bear off Dr.Dolittle. Me and the Bear would chill all the time. We'd smoke all day and just laugh at simple stuff. Smokey the Bear wouldn't have nothing on us cause all we would do is burn. Okay just playing on the last part but the bear would be down with my crew. We would just board all day. The bear's swag would be off the charts. I'll name it Beary the Bear Bear. While I'm shredding on my brand new Rossignol Retox Amptek board. Beary would be boarding on a custom made Tree Bark board SWAG. Where they do that at??? Board on tree bark. It'll be the first bear to land a Frontside Double Cork 1260. Now if Beary got out of hand I'll have to go Goku primal mode on it. I'll grab some Jack Link's Beef Jerky out of my utility belt and feed my wild side. It wouldn't be like the movie Semi-Pro. It woulbe no more Beary...

By: Cam K

February 14

i would use my use my recently acquired bear skills considering during the summer i had 4 different close encounters with black bears. in order to fend it off i would stare it in the eyes telling it i mean no harm and i would stay still. if that didnt work throw a distracting object at i and run/bike like hell

By: Leo G

February 14

When the bear comes i would chop him/ her into 7 peices(with the sledge hammer that i always have). Then i would peel the skin offthe body of it with my teeth just in case i ever get cold(it could also be a good house decoration). When i am finished doing that i would get all the meat off of him/her, put some salt on it, and feed it to my awesome dog.Then i would hide all remaining corps and guess what, you have escaped the all mighty bear.

By: andres benavides

February 14

boardslide the motherfucker and pray i dont catch an edge

By: jake

February 14

take a shotgun and blow that motherfuckers face off!!

By: Kelvin Aidoo

February 14

i would perform a Flying Squirrel. the bear would so impressed it would smash its paws together signifying my awesomeness.

By: Dan Golembiewski

February 14

Poop my pants, and rely on the terrible stench to scare away the bear. Bears do have a great sense of smell.

By: Joe Sedon

February 14

If I did not have the Rossignol Retox, I would be hopeless against an attacking bear. With the Retox, however, I would hide behind the board and the wild bear would be instantly scared off by the ferocious, bloodied bear on my deck's topsheet. So basically, the Retox would not only help me shred, but it would also save my life.

By: Leo

February 14

most likely a bear would come while your camping right? Well not this bear that chill bear on that sick board. There is no need to escape this bear he is the coolist. If i needed him to leave just tell him to leave and we'll go snowboarding another day.Then hes out thats mahh boyyy

By: Jack Moran

February 14

I would be that one guy in the lift line that ALWAYS slaps his board and looks like an idiot, hoping it would be loud enough to scare it away.

By: Hannah Liburd

February 14

I would befriend the bear. One of life's great lessons, taught through the medium of BBC comedy, is that bears love badminton. I would set up our net accompanied by my racket and cock and throw down with the big furry lump, we would then eat porridge... But not to thick and not to runny (a.k.a just right)

By: knuckbuckin Black

February 14

stand ina crucufix son! scare them demons rat out...

By: Julian Winze

February 14

At first i would roll up a joint then i would ask the bear if he likes some puffs .as a result we would get so high and we would shred all day

By: Mason Bradford

February 14

Obviously the best way to get away from a bear would be to occupy him with an issue of snowboarder magazine and quickly make a run for it down the mountain. I mean once you pick an issue up its gonna be a while before you put it back down.. perfect get away plan!

By: Hayden Mactavish

February 14

I would set up a small kicker and MJ the bear like a jib.

By: Mike Ventura

February 14

Fetal position, come on who hasn't seen without a paddle. DB Cooper represent!

By: Matthew Ide

February 14

I would crank up my music full blast until until the bear tires himself out from an insane rave!!!

By: Darla Loflin

February 14

Age old question: Does a bear $h!t in the woods?? I'd give him the new Snowboarder Magazine and tell him to go find a nice place to take a $h!t in the woods!

By: Ryan

February 14

If i encountered a bear I would run up the nearest hill and climb a tree. While in the tree i would break off the biggest branch I could find. I would then fashion the branch into a spear of sorts. Then I would jump from the tree with the spear and impale the bear in the lower to mid region of the back. Problem Solved.

By: jack

February 14

Put on a 15ft giant salmon costume and chase it with a stick :0)

By: sam

February 14

Lay down act dead & wait end of !

By: William Deskins

February 14

As a respectable member of modern society, I would first attempt to the reason with said bear. A little known fact about bears, given the right circumstance, bears are quite fond of smooth jazz and red wine. I would then realize that I have neither of these things and resort to plan b: beat the fuck out of that bear with my bare hands and ride it like Abraham Lincoln. After overpowering and domesticating the bear, I would feel it appropriate to name him something sweet like Skullcrusher or Bitchbeater. I would then ride Bitchbeater into the sunset, forever free of all worry and anxiety, for I am that man: The Man Who Rides Bitchbeater the Bear.

By: Tanner P

February 14

i float like a butterfly and sting like a bee, i give that baer something he will remeber for the rest of his life, thats of corse if he lives after im done with him!!

By: Jay B

February 14

I would sacrifice a woman and throw her at the bear! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szFO7Wo7ZCE.

By: Adam johansen

February 13

If a bear came after me I would jump up and down and do 360s while I was charging it with a stick... If that doesn't work I would just run and climb up a tree

By: Adam Johansen

February 13

If a bear encountered me I would jump up and d

By: Joey Venner

February 13

I would run and scream like an= little girl, No joke im honest! Ha

By: britton

February 13

call Chuck Norris, he would show the bear his fist then the bear will eat itself because it would be a less painful way to die.

By: Justin S.

February 13

Disrespect its mother, steal his girl friend, email him picutes of the dirty dirty, then, if he could bear more without getting grizzly, id toss him a nice pow slash in that classic utah powder.

By: Rafa

February 13

with a bearhugkungfugripsuckerpunch360suplexbacklfip of course!

By: Richard

February 13

easy, run faster than the person next to you

By: Ethan Ashworth

February 13

with an arrow to the knee, bro.

By: Connor

February 13

I would find it's mother

By: Mike

February 13

I would invite my loser, non rent paying, lazy sack of turd roommate for a day on the slopes(for which i would be paying for), soak his 1980's outerwear in bear vagina juice (thus attracting male bear), and leave him for dead. The End

By: Liang

February 13

I will lend him my snowboard.

By: DI

February 13

Dress up like Ranger Smith of Jellystone Park

By: Jason Schaeffer

February 13

First let me say, I don't see bears in the forest. They see me. After the inital shock of the sighting, they go find their bear friends to prove to them my exsistance. An argument breaks out between them when deciding who is going to approach me. They have so many questions, but everything just comes out as,"Growwwwwwwl." But the bears know........I speak bear. After they're done explaining what huge fans they are, they all want to know the same thing. How did you become such a great snowboarder? To which I respond,"Growwwwl growlll grooowl growl g-growl." Some may ask why I would share such a profound secret with bears? To which I respond,"So they wouldn't eat me stupid! They're bears!"

By: Jasper Volmer

February 13

I would sing the song bearforce1(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twQlpFrm5iM) with the corresponding dance. This can lead to one of these two reactions: Reaction A: the bear is a straight bear and runs away as fast as he can, which is the only right reaction to this song... Reaction B: the bear is a gay bear, which brings you into even greater trouble because singing this song would make you a suitable mating partner.... But hey what was that saying again?! "If we want authenticity, we'll have to initiate it "

By: jackson

February 13

I would hide behind JP's chin.

By: Miles ritch

February 13

If i had a crew with me all i have to do is run faster than one of them or sley the bear with a backside 720 off the tree jib i just made sliceing his juger with my edge then procced to safety

By: Liam C.

February 13

I would shoot him in the Dick and run like hell.

By: Marcellis Wallace

February 13

I'd throw whatever food I had away from me but nearby the bear, then play dead.

By: Rick

February 12

I'd nollie frontside 180* up, nose press him head to tail and then drink a redbull to fly away with my awesome new board to safety! Because that bear's gonna be straight pissed about meow. ( *-* ) ____ ll /"[/] <---redbull. __ „/ || __ __//_\\__„ m ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,„„„„ _____________ /„,/„\^^^^^^/„,/\„„\*______________

By: Rachel

February 12

I would follow by example from Without a Paddle... "Get in the fetal position!"

By: Andrew H

February 12

FENDING OFF A BEAR 101: Senario: Actions 1. Steals yo food Stop bear mid action with "Holllld Up Yogi, Nah uh, put it back!" 2. Refuses to return food Say with serious mom voice "Bear! Don't make me call Foghorn Leghorn!" 3. Proceeds to eat food Maintain serious mom voice "That's it Yogi Berra i'm stealing yo babies!" 4. Bear approaches while "Do you mind handing me that leaf?" doing #2 in forest 5. You walk in on bear "Oh! sorry, excuse me. Here's a leaf" doing #2 in forest 6. Catch bear hunting "mm,mm,mm. (shake head) Does your mother know about this?" salmon with gun 7. Find bear with Smuckers jar in hand and paws covered Snap picture, pretend its blood, and print on Rossignol board. in strawberry jam

By: Patrick K

February 12

I would grab a jar of honey and roll it down a hill. The bear wouldn't stand a chance.

By: kokanee ranger

February 12

DRINK A CAN OF POWERTHIRST AND BEAR-BLAST HIM!!!

By: Chris G

February 12

The first rule of escaping a bear is situational awareness. For example, if I ran into the bear featured on the Rossi Retox Amptech board, I would know he is a French male brown bear (ursus actos) from the Pyrenees looking for some female bear action. The t-shirt with the French cock on it is a dead give away of his nationality, the cock is to the French what the bald eagle is to Americans. There are only about 20 French Brown bears left in the wild and they all live in the Pyrenees. I assume that he got the blond tiger high highlights in order to impress the ladies. France's first lady Carla Bruni-Sarkozy is a big fan of the brown bears, as a former model she may have suggested the highlights to improve his mating chances. Whatever you do don't speak Slovenian, a couple years ago wildlife officials imported some Slovenian female brown bears to help the French bears get some action, so now the bears think of Slovenian as the language of love, crazy huh! To keep the bear calm you may want to offer him some liqueur like Chartreuse, its sweet, strong, and made from flowers and herbs that bears like to eat. I would be generous with the Chartreuse because while the monks that sell the stuff say its an elixir of long life, it taste foul to me. Remember because male brown bears can weight around 700 lbs., you will want him to be drinking a lot more than you, just be glad you didn't run into the Spanish brown bear because they can really drink. At this point slowly back away from the bear, wish him “bonne chance” with the ladies and get the hell out of there.

By: Nick

February 12

Luckily I had a big one the night before and the smell of my AGB (after grog bog) would be enough to scare the bear off.

By: Zack

February 12

I'd give the bear that Rossignol board he always wanted.

By: Diamond

February 12

I'd give it a serenade.

By: RG

February 12

I would put on a pair of those sweet leopard/zebra print women's Shaun White collection pants and I think that would about do it.

By: Jeremy

February 12

Well in some ways, I can sympathize with a rage-filled angry bear. So, in order to escape a bear attack I would appeal to his softer, gentler side. First I would encourage him to consider the negative effects his anger is having on his bear life, and help him to break his denial. I would explain to him how his rage is standing in the way of his potential, and remind him what kind of an example he is setting for his cubs. I would encourage him to look at his claws and ask him, "Is this who you really want to be tomorrow?". Right then I would flip up my Rossignol Retox Amptek board, and show him the bear in the mirror. How his red rooster shirt symbolizes his aggression toward others, and his stripes represent his internal conflict. Finally I would help him see, like his forefathers Yogi and Smokey, how he can make a positive difference in his life and the lives of other bears. All he has to do is make the choice to break free from his rage and blood-lust, and he can begin a new journey of freedom. Then I would go for the hug, and tell him I believe in him. ...at that point he might still kill me... ...but at least I tried.

By: jim

February 12

I would escape my bear encounter by playing him/her "I Will Always Love You" by Whitney Houston via my MP3 player. That alone would kill virtually any bear alive, thereby allowing me to escape to listen to the Deftones.

By: slash gordon

February 12

i would bust out some jams from one of kid rocks new albums and that bear would head for the hills so fast cause that music sucks!

By: Dalton

February 12

i would juke the bear and peace outttttt...and when im not doing that u can always catch me on Snowboardermag.com Much Love and stay SHreddin!

By: Jack

February 12

Eat two tins of beans, followed by a pint of guiness & fart in his general direction, one wiff will for sure knock him out .

By: matt

February 12

well im really hairy and that is obviously a female bear so i would just get naked and the she would think i was a guy bear and ......uuuuuhhhh awkward

By: greg

February 12

hand him da peace pipe then we be bro's then we hit the resort

By: matt gregory

February 12

hes just hungry so i would suggest we shred down the mountain and i'd buy him some grub from the local dinner then we'd pick up some honey's then go shred the pow then hang out at his place with the honey's and lots of beers,smoke and a bon fire

By: gunnar

February 12

I gonna protect myselfe whit my snowboard! and when the bear is eating my snowboard i will kick him in the nutzz and run away :)

By: Steven Patton

February 12

I would run to the nearest tree, conveniently find Chuck Norris there and have him chop the tree into a snowboard so I could ride down the mountain to safety as he held the bear back with the power of his beard. Haha

By: Tyler

February 11

Here in Michigan bear encounters are as rare as good riding. This being said I would distract the bear with my 12oz bear shaped honey, while the bear is enjoying its treat me and christopher robbins would strap works bombs to him. Bear Blasting...similar to (Hump Cating)

By: Yoshi

February 11

The way I would fend off a bear would be with my fists, I'd sucka punch him right is bear balls and ride him like a board down the mountain doing methods all over the shop

By: Colby Yee

February 11

Just ask Dwight Schrute http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYkWWnZm6-w

By: Cody Taylor

February 11

It has always been a dream of mine to fend off a bear with a bone knife, maybe ill die maybe i wont but someday im going to kill a bear with a bone knife!

By: Tommy Pollett

February 11

I would look at him intently then with a rush of realization say.."Dude! i thought i recognized you! You're that kick-ass bear thats on the front of my new Rossignol Snowboard!" And he would blush and say.."Oh man i remember that shoot! they put me in heaps of Tees and made me pose all afternoon! I'm glad they chose the Red tee! It was the best pic by far!" To which i would reply "I agree bro, you keen for a shred?" Then we newly acquainted pals would head off in the fresh pow shredding it up!

By: Calvin Tam

February 11

I would probs yell at him and tell him to go away, if he didn't. I'd just yell at him some more.

By: Jared

February 11

First off, I would try to reason with the bear; after all, bear is my native tongue. If that were to not work, I would feed him little pieces of cheese. Why would I feed him little pieces of cheese you ask? Who doesn't love cheese!?!? That's why! Surely I would win him over and we would be the best of pals. Unless the cheese made him more hungry, in which case I would give him my beaten up 2009 skate banana as collateral for not eating me... after all, I don't need it anymore, I'm gonna win a Rossignol Retox Amptek in a snowboarder mag give away.

By: Jason

February 11

I don't always escape bears (I prefer to stay and fight) but when I do I use Travis Rices' gear that I carry in my K2 Sentinel Backpack, which mind you I only bought thanks to Snowboarder Mags Golden Seal of Approval. Obviously the bear would notice who's beautiful Lib Tech board and sexy Quicksilver pants I had and we'd make an even trade, he gets the gear and I continue the shred because as we all know, it remains.

By: Matthew Strang

February 11

If the bear is a black bear I would grab my Rossignol Retox Amptek snowboard and jib up an entire tree, and stay up there. But because bears can climb trees i would situate myself on a brach and dive off the tree into 7 feet of powder and snowboard under the top layer of snow that melted and then refroze to create a nice roof over me. I would then snowboard out of there under the icy snow. But because bears are so damn heavy he would break the icy snow and catch up to me. I would then ollie to the surface of the snow and go full speed, without me knowing there is a 170 foot cliff. I would then jump off the cliff rolling down the windows and screaming, I would then think well im going to die so ill go out in stile, I would then do some crazy flips off the cliff and land in 20 feet of snow because there was an avalanche the day before. So I'm alive and well with my Rossignol Retox Amptek snowboard, oh and the bear is at the top of the cliff because bears can't fly. Now, if the bear was a Grizzly, well i would just be F***ED. So yeah.

By: matt

February 11

i would feed him some mushrooms so he can jump out of the board and ride it himself with me everywhere terrorizing the GAPERS.

By: David Lafrance

February 11

As soon as it approached me, I'd look at it straight into its eyes and soul. From that point on, I'd make it look with my superpowers at atrocities no man (or bear) has ever witnessed. 10 seconds into this painful event, the bear wouldn't be able to take it anymore and would gouge out its own eyes, thus making its own murderous claws bloodier than ever. From that moment on, I would become the mother of the orphan cubs and show them how to ride the snowboard like pros.

By: Parsa

February 11

Pee in a circle around myself, creating an invisible protective sphere in which i would hold my Bear Hug pose waiting to attack

By: Tyson Payne

February 11

That bear is obviously just pissed that he isn't a zebra. So I would just act like a lion!

By: Alex

February 11

just kick him in the balls than round house him in the face that should get'r done

By: Matt

February 11

Get 'r Done!

By: Megan

February 11

Well, he has a red shirt on. He's obviously Winnie the Pooh. So since I carry honey everywhere I go, I could give that to him. We would basically be friends by then. (duuuh.)

By: Victor U

February 11

well the bear is probably just lonely and most likely bunged up, I'd be pissed too. So I would give him some Kale and introduce him to my ex girlfriend. she's adorable... fucking bitch.

By: James

February 11

*Phone Rings* "Bear old chap, would love to stay and chat, but I really must take this call. Awfully sorry" Then run like shit.

By: Nicholas Y.

February 11

I would first crawl up in the fetal position and then as it creeps up on me I would do a jumping roundhouse kick to it's face and then repeatedly start kicking it in the face and stomach. Once I see blood I would end it off with the people's elbow in it's teeth.

By: Elias Van Gestel

February 11

First, I give him a present so he thinks I'm nice , then we be friends and we go to Disneyland but Disney were closed so we go to Bear mountain , we shred all day and in the we see bear's mother and then the bear be happy and never want to hurt human again.

By: Amir S.

February 11

Well, obviously the bear found out that someone stole his pants (what other reasons are there for a bear to go running around half-naked like this one?!), so unfortunately I would have to give him mine - better than having this giant bear jump at you... As for the red stuff dripping from his hand - that's obviously remains from the jello he had for breakfast. And as for me - now I have to get myself some new pants! :P

By: Jake

February 10

with a hand behind my back to make it fair

By: justin

February 10

this crazy old guy i know worked at yellowstone this past summer. he told me what to do to escape a bear encounter..."run up to it and poke it in the eyes really hard, then you jump up on its back...." haha i don't remember what your supposed to next true story though Ron is crazy

By: Jack

February 10

You throw a flashbang into his cave so he runs out. Now he's stunned and unaware. Jump off the top rope, Barrett .50 Cal, Double Cork no scope, head shot. Then you drink his blood, giving you the strength of a bear. Then you go back to Iowa and kill it on the small amounts of snow there.

By: Peter

February 10

If I encountered a bear in the wild I would show my teeth and snarl. If that didn't scare him, I'd approach him and box him on the ears to try and trigger his flight instinct. I'm not a wildlife ranger, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

By: JJ

February 10

When worse comes to worse, break out the bag-o-jokes. "What did the Grizzly Bear say to the Polar Bear? You're Un-Bearable." Baddah bing baddah bang, hey.

By: Wil

February 10

Throw something at its face, as a distraction, then provide a swift kick in the groin. Then make sure I outrun the slowest person.

By: Brown

February 10

First, I would call up my buddies Bruce Lee and The Undertaker. Then I'll get out my Jack Hawk 9000 that I bought at Wal-Mart. Bruce Lee will do some karate on that bear and make him all groggy. When this happens the Undertakers gonna use his choke slam on this bitch and pin him. Then I'll use my Jack Hawk 9000 and slit the bears throat, chop him up and make some bear burgers for a job well done.

By: Jamey

February 10

I know just what to do. When we was kids and there weren't no powder on the mountain Pap used to think it were fun to play this game called "poke the bear" and we kids would beg him, "No Pap, please Pap...don't poke the bear!" but it weren't no use and before long Pap would have that bear madder than a rattlesnake with balls, then Pap would sit up on the porch and laugh as we ran around pissing ourselves trying to get away, except for my lil brother Cephus, he'd play dead and it would mostly work except that he ain't got but one leg now and he can't pee standing up so folks think he's a skier but me, I figured something out about them bears, see bears, they got needs, they're just like women except they can't talk and they menstruate year round (and that's a pretty fair trade off). See what a bear needs is to feel like it's being listened to, ain't no need to solve no problems, a bear don't need you to rescue its ass, hell no, it's a bear ain't it. So I'd would just sit there and listen to that bear and nod along all supportive-like and pretty soon that bear's going to be feeling a heap better and before you know it that bear will be thanking me for listening and telling me to go off and snowboard because it knows that's what I really want to do anyway and after pretending to put up a fight I'll grab that new Rossignol and hit the slopes and with any luck there'll be a steaming, hot deer carcass waiting on me when I get home.

By: Charles

February 10

Why would I fend off a beer? Oh! you meant bear, I would give her some pepper, bears love pepper. Or was that a different animal...

By: Peter

February 10

I'd have your intern Jade start talking to him he'd end up running away quick.

By: Andrew

February 10

I'd chase him down on my buffalo!

By: Zoid

February 10

I would tame it. Then wake up and remember I don't even snowboard.

By: Justin

February 10

Being that I was in a place where bears are, I would definitely have some Mary Jane, and the Governor (by Smith and Wesson) with me. Standing in front of a bear that is sizing me up, like they always do before they attack, I would try to make the best of it by sparking a spliff and blasting away. I am not a hunter and would have only killed the bear to survive, but I would not waste any part of the bear. I would carve it up and end up with an authentic bear snowboarding suit, a bear claw necklace, bear steaks and jerky, bear bone tools and fertilizer for my mom's garden. Then I would have to go out and get some king of a bear tattoo, not sure what yet, but that would have to happen, perhaps some sort of R.I.P. Smokey.

By: Kyle A

February 10

Well i would probably be high as fuck and have some weed so i would make a peace offering with the bear and get him/her high as fuck as well. Then he would turn into a hippie bear and we can go trip some acid together.

By: Ben Rupp

February 10

I would tell the "bear" in question that I am flattered, but I'm not interested. Just because I'm a big guy with a beard and good fashion sense doesn't mean that I swing that way.

By: nick w

February 10

now im from the deep south and hunt fish and when i get the chance to go up north i board. ya know dats why scott lagos my idole bc he seems like a my type a guy. they talk big wear i am. think dey can hunt bears in stuf. so really this story is real fittin'. i once had a baby bear in my garbagge can and so you know what i did. i put on my overal jean. isnuck up on this bear and grebbed its ears. so well it does wanna dem fancy bear skretches bc it know its in trouble bc im way biggr, dan it. huh? well mama bear comes haulin into the garage right, it scared the bejebers outta me and so i ran inside like it Was tomorrow. hoppen ta pop a see me. so da bear,,, ohh and it a bigol grizz grizz. you see wear i live dey callem da griz griz. short for grizly bear. so it breaks into my house by tdis time all i thank a is ol daddays shotgun. bc my thommy was auta ammo. got to have a thommy bc i live in da crime zone a hickory north carolina. so i aget hol a my daddys shotty and pow after i walk down dem wood steps. i blow the smoke off a the barrel. and i say outloud what dey say from round here, and dats some forign like spainish o french. Aurevoir Amigo.

By: Aaron

February 10

Aight, so if we're talking about a bear, there is only one way to escape it. Either your going to scrap it out, or you are going to run for your life. Personally i would have to see how big the bear is, and what weapons i have. If it is big im dippin' the hell out.

By: Cam Tolmie

February 10

The bear on the board is wearing red. I'd unleash an angry bull.*† *(Aussuming bulls win against bears) †(How I deal with the bull is a story for another time)

By: Jacob Coyle

February 10

I would just send a telepathic message to the bear reversing his instinct to attack me to an instinct to be friend me. Then I would hop on his back and I would ride him around like a horse. We would then proceed to have a legendary friendship, if we became good enough friends I would teach how to snowboard.

By: brandon sweeney

February 10

if i had to fight off a bear i would try to trick him 1st by throwing some honey candies that i always have towards the bear. hopefully he would take the bait and id be safe but candy less. so yeah thanks.

By: Daniel

February 10

Hey man a snowboard can make a great weapon, and if my run in with the bear doesnt come equip with a snowboard i'll kick it in the nutz and run!

By: Tara

February 10

If i was on a snowboard i'd jib its head, just a little boink right on the head to knock it out. If i was snowboardless i would throw my voice and make a wookie sound like it was coming from a bush behind the bear. Then while the bears preoccupied looking for chewbacca i'd run like hell.

By: Brandon Gray

February 10

i would strap a bear banger on the front toes of my boots then when i chuck double corks grabbing mute i could reach down and bang the horn. if that bear dont leave, good thing i just got my edges sharpened because this board is spinning around right for the bears noggin. watch out yogi!

By: Explosions are awesome

February 10

One word, well one acronym actually, RPG!

By: drew

February 10

I'd snap its neck, rip its head off and wear its head around like a god damn boss...while making the rick ross "uhhh" noise

By: jondeez

February 10

I would let the bear kill me.

By: Mike J.

February 10

I am guessing it's a polar bear. I usually carry a coke with me to give my old ass an extra kick on the mountain. (Gotta be careful opening it though) Since they apparently love Coke, based on the commercials, I'd just throw throw it one and hopefully be on my way. If not, and I had this board, I would just hold it up in front of me so it would think I was another bear and hopefully the "liquid" running down my leg would be enough to mark my territory and make it go away.

By: mark gassler

February 10

Squatch* damn pretexts saying squatch isn't a word

By: mark gassler

February 10

Swiss army knife..... I would pull out the tooth pick and stab it in the temple. Then I would do a squats call to help drag it to the bbq. Really not a big deal

By: Kyle Hamilton

February 10

To fight a bear, follow these easy steps! 1. Lower its morale: This can easily be done by kicking rosebushes at it, bears hate prickly objects, plus the fact that you look like some kind of tripped-up witch doctor doing it is surely going to make him question his decisions! 2. Make it regret its decision to attack: if you don't have Jeff Magnum handy to help you out with this, no problem! Just sing as loudly as you can at it " IIII LOOOOVEEEE YOOUUUUU JEEESSSUUUSSS CHRRRIIIIST" or an even choicier line " SEMEN STAINED THE MOUNTAINTOPS". This serves two purposes, firstly, it makes Jeff Magnum proud of you ( always good) and secondly, the bear will never question quite how virile you are ever again!

By: Michael Dittrich

February 10

Contest ends 2/17/12? I need more time, i wrote BEAR grylls an email and asked for advice...

By: Adam Kimbrough

February 10

Probably wouldn't..just saying, crutches slow ya down.

By: Dylan Carbonneau

February 10

I can talk bear cause I'm just that much of a beast. So I'd say "Woah Bear, how about we go grab lunch some place like a good poutine at a ski rsort, then we head off to the hills and snowboard !?" Obviously, he would accept and we would go off riding ! I would ride the Retox Amptek and he could borrow my old and super wide Burton since bears probably have big feet. We would become great friends and no harm would be cause to me or him ! We would finnish the day off with a cold Pabst Blue Ribbon beer in front of a campfire in a wooden loge, reading the latest SNOWBOARDER.

By: Nathan Moore

February 10

One thing a bear isn't gonna mess with..... a bad ass jedi. Id wave my hand and use my force powers to tip him down the mountain. Easy!

By: Pasquale

February 10

I would strap on my new rossignol snowboard and make my way through the the most glorious tree run of my life because this could be my last run ever so I would have to.make it count. If the bear caught up to me I would turn on my ninja skills and turn that bear into a chipmunk with one giant kick to the face!! Than I would tame the bear and make it my personal back country explorer. While everyone aroubd me has snowmobiles ill well have a glorious bear that well love me uncoditionally through all times!!

By: Jonas Dufek

February 10

I'd throw him a peppered steak with some roofies stuck in it, and then take it to mike Tyson's house.

By: Josh Bruno

February 10

Obviously I'd be DEEP in the Utah backcountry a bear comes up and fronts me I'd do what any one would do and that's get on my high stance but my arms up and act like the bear, I mean what grizzly would hurt it's own kin, let alone a cute one like myself. After this I would lure the bear to bed( not in a sexual way) in mid sleep I'd have to betray the bear and leave the Deep backcountry of Utah, which of course would break that bears heart.

By: Nick Murphy

February 10

Bro Id deffenitly garb his ear and say nice nice nice till he calmed down then I would teach him to shred and become friends with the bear and he would always let me ride him and he would tow me into big jibs and he would be the best bear shreder in the world!!!!!!!

By: Jayton

February 10

This summer I learned a game from Boogie called: Bear, Cowboy, Ninja. at High Cascade Snowboard Camp on Mt. Hood. Rules are: 1. stand back to back. 2. the cowboy shoots the bear, the bear is stronger then a ninja and the ninja assassinates the cowboy. 3. jump around to each other and show: pistols, claws or kung fu snake style. So I'll show that bear my pistols and the board is mine ;)

By: Dan Pudlicki

February 10

I would use my new retox the slice that bears throat!!1!

By: KT

February 10

It's going to depend on the kind of bear. There's different strategies for black bears and grizzlies. If it's a grizzly, I better have a gun or play real dead. That thing is gonna chase me and catch me. And yeah it can climb trees. If I escape it's probably because a grizzly had a heart attack or I was wearing a 'bear proof outfit' like the one Troy Hurtubise used. At the zoo, a man once said that you should take out your knife and unzip a bear like a jacket. This man was an idiot and in no way worked for a zoo. Don't get it confused. Unfortunately because bears aren't humans, I can't just reason with one. I can usually weasel my way out of getting beat up, but in this case, I don't bank on that being a good approach. So, I have a couple options. One is to run in an indirect manner hoping to fool the bear a bit. Also, I need to somehow scare the bear. Is there anything scarier than the music of Celine Dion. For my money there isn't, so I better remember some of those lyrics and try to work the bear into some sort of trance like state with my vocal range. If that doesn't work, I'm gonna hiss and growl. That's sort of how every escape ever ends for me.

By: Andrew Fredrickson

February 10

upon finding an angry bear, i would allow the bear to bite, and hold onto, my left arm for the sole purpose of getting close to the bear. with my left arm stuck down the bears throat, i would proceed to bite the bear in the jugular spilling all of its blood all over the place. the bear would let go of my left arm, leaving it completely useless. with my remaining good arm, i would find a branch and proceed to beat whatever living shit is left in the bear, out.

By: Skoey V.

February 10

True story - I was 16 years old, living in Haines, Alaska with my family. We literally lived at the "end of the road" along the ocean. We would hunt black and brown (grizzly) bear at the edge of our property where the mountain came down to the sea. One summer night we were spotlight hunting and a large griz was in the trees across the small cove from the cabin. We took a shot, hit it, and watched it run into the deep brush. Deciding against suicide (chasing a wounded brown bear in the dark), we waiting until morning to go after it. In the AM dad and I jumped in the canoe, let the dogs loose on the beach and followed them from the water as they tracked the bear. We could hear them moving through the brush and motored along slowly as they worked the side of the mountain. Suddenly all hell broke lose and dad told me to beach the canoe on the rocks in front of us. He jumped out with a 12 gauge shotgun and told me to stay put, and told me to get the hell out of dodge if the bear made an appearance on the beach. The dogs had found the wounded bear, and being the cowards they were, ran away - right down the mountain to us! The dogs cleared the heavy brush in front of us yipping and howling, made the beach and split, running their asses off. The bear was right behind them. Dad yelled for me to get clear, shouldered the shotgun and starting dumping 00 buck and slugs into the bear as it came out of the alders 25 yards away. His last shell dumped the grizzly onto it's face less than 15 feet away. Dad put down the shotgun, un-holstered his .44, walked up to the bear and put one in it's ear. Cool as a cat outside in December. I sat in the canoe, wide-eyed and frozen, trying to remember how to breath. This was the first of quite a few memorable bear encounters while growing up hunting moose, caribou and deer in Alaska (while snowboarding every season!). How would I escape? Make sure dad's icy veins and arsenal are close by, and leave the damn dogs in the truck.

By: Richard Savage

February 10

I've always fancied myself a wildlife Dr. Doolittle with a Mike Hawk/Bear Grylls edge. It was never a question of "if" but "when" I encounter a bear. I would sing at the top of my lungs Bowie's "Pressure". It would epitomize my current state and let the bear know- I'm about to blow your mind with my musical capabilities. If that fails, ride hard down the hill as fast as my board can fly.

By: C Buck

February 10

If a grizzly bear threatened to eat me I would pull a Chuck Norris move. I would show the bear my fist and the bear would proceed to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.

By: Max

February 10

I would beat it to death with a recently won Rossignol snowboard. or else I would die...

By: Jason Schaeffer

February 10

First let me say, I don't see bears in the forest. They see me. After the inital shock of the sighting, they go find their bear friends to prove to them my exsistance. An argument breaks out between them when deciding who is going to approach me. They have so many questions, but everything just comes out as,"Growwwwwwwl." But the bears know........I speak bear. After they're done explaining what huge fans they are, they all want to know the same thing. How did you become such a great snowboarder? To which I respond,"Growwwwl growlll grooowl growl g-growl." Some may ask why I would share such a profound secret with bears? To which I respond,"So they wouldn't eat me stupid! They're bears!"

By: Kevin

February 10

Follow the Dwight Schrute "How To Survive A Bear Attack"

By: Michiel Schroeyers

February 10

I would do a ninja throw to tha bear with my board. The sharpenned edges will kill him... So when I get home, I shout, I BROUGHT DINNER!!!

By: Tyler Moncrieff

February 10

First I would avoid eye contact to show the bear respect. Then I would prepare a salmon sandwich for the bear with a bear claw donuts for desert. Once his appetite was satisfied I would offer him a nail filer as a parting gift so the bear could stay fresh with his claw game. Finally I would walk away slowly in a backwards fashion. You should never turn your back on a bear.

By: kris

February 10

I would start jerking off then blow a load right in the bears eye, blinded by the jizz i would skip off into the woods!!

By: Ivan

February 10

i would made him a peanut butter and honey sandwich

By: Katy

February 10

i would show him my tits. There so ugly he would die

By: nick puffer

February 10

Clearly a bear knuckle boxing match is the only option in this situation.

By: scott

February 10

id show him a picture of my ex-girlfriend. Trust me, he would run.

By: Luis Figueroa

February 10

If I was unlucky to encounter a bear?? You best declare that bear the one unlucky, since he must deal with me, to be fair. Upper cut to the jaw, that's the first thing his lady-bear saw. Jib-jabbing at the tummy, til he was bleeding gummy. Licking the goodness from my fist, I'd look him in the eye and blow him a kiss. Cuz next comes the roundhouse kick to the face, make him look like Fozzie full of grace. You might say my approach is pretty brutal: "It's a grizzly, resistance is futile!" Hush down little one, in this here battle I will not run. For it's Free Goods Friday, and this beast stands in the way, of me snagging that sweet board today.

By: Morgan Bexfield

February 10

I AM A Woods Man, So me and the Bear Would already be buds, So I would give him a High Five and then we would make a campfire. After we were done BS'ing He would pull out his acoustic guitar and we would jam to "Kumbayah".

By: Casey Diaz

February 10

The bear looks like hes a member of the bloods. Gangster bears dont play! The listen to gangster rap and act all hard. I would sweat that bear and be like what! I would then run and find some crips, and tell them about this blood bear that thinks hes all hard, and hes trying to eat me. Hopefully they would ride on his ass and pop that bear and show him what time it is. Then just to show repect I would pour out alittle liq.

By: Adam Barnes

February 10

I would give it a pic-a-nic basket. It would open it (because he's smarter than the average bear) to discover that there's actually no food in it: do you honest think I have the kind of money to be feeding a bear!? He'd laugh about it though, and then he'd let me put a saddle on him and ride him around the forest. I'd name him Clive. I'd feed him grilled cheese sandwiches. My mother wouldn't approve though, she'd say he's a bad influence. But what does she know? I love Clive.

By: Molly

February 10

To escape a bear attack, I would show it my snowboard and offer it a free lesson. If it refused, I'd probably be killed.

By: Andy Forseman

February 10

Simple, I have a voice like an angel. I would sing his big butt to sleep. Believe it!

By: Brian Wagner

February 10

I would drop a match in a pile of leaves and walk away.

By: mark gassler

February 10

I would share half of the keg that i happen to be carrying with me in the forest with the bear. Then, when the bear is nice and drunk, i would kill it for drinking half of my fucking beer.

By: mark gassler

February 10

I would probably let him share my picnic basket full of honey and pass my water bong as long he didnt start any forest fires. I would make sure he cares about the bare necessities. Then i would wake up from my dream finding out i just got mauled and possible raped from a yogi,winnie,smokey,sunshine bear, or baloo type bear.

By: Nick

February 10

Simple...outrun the slow guy.

By: Michael Auchincloss

February 10

If a bear was to attack, hopefully I would have my Gorillas with me. As we all know Gorillas are much better fighters than bears and as such they would be able to divert the bears attention and gang up on it, take it down and allow me to escape. I love my gorillas.

By: ChristopherWinze

February 10

I would catch my feet and play cat and mouse with him or just stand still and not looking him into his eyes depends on my self-confidence in this moment ^^

By: Kevin Ice

February 10

First Off Ide stare the Bear in the Eyes to see whats goin on and how serious the situation is. Then Ide pull out my 45 Revolver and shoot the Bear in between his eyes. Because Im a man and we are at the top of the Food Chain, and that's how we do it in Alaska.:)

By: Matt Hutchinson

February 10

First I would climb a tree, then run down a hill. Seeing as both those options are not a good way to get away from a bear and definitely not by any means a good way of fending off a bear. I would do this.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkDGZVyUkOQ And instead of walking away.. I would shred away

By: Balint Fabry

February 10

On my new Rossignol snowboard. :P

By: Kev tew

February 10

I would pull my pants down, that's scared a few monsters of in it's time.

By: Jeroen

February 10

I would start with getting my 15 weeks old cat because it's a real monster :D and let him take down the bear!! He likes to jump people from behind so i he would jump the bear from behind and take him down!! And after that take him down the hill on this board!

By: Rob Anthony

February 10

Id start humping his leg like a dog in heat. confused by my moves...the bear would be the one trying to escape.

By: Marcus Skin

February 10

First of all i would give the bear a hug then we would be buddies. once we are buddies we would go shred out bear mountain :)

By: Nolen Ballard

February 10

With my bear hands! Bear ass naked.