Jumping To Negative Conclusions

June 5

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negative conclusions ticker

Now that 99% of the ski areas in North America have ceased winter operations, SNOWBOARDER Magazine resorts to all manner of tactics to avoid depression in the off season. One surefire way to do this is to put it all into perspective and realize that no matter how bad another summer without snow seems it could always be worse. Nothing works to accomplish this like watching the video of Lindsey Jacobellis falling in the boardercross at the 2006 Torino Olympics. That, or we simply watch videos of long jumpers falling over and over again.

–Pat Bridges

Though he won’t admit it, we suspect that deep down being able to announce this fall was the highlight of Todd Richards’ career in snowboarding.

There are businessmen in the ski industry that believe that this crash as it appeared every Saturday on the intro to Wide World Of Sports in the 70s and 80s led to the decline of skiing and the rise of snowboarding in the 90s. Not kidding.

And Ben Hinkley thought he invented the lawn dart. There has got to be a front angle of this with a landing.

Nordic bindings aren’t even designed to be releasable! Upon second thought, maybe they are meant to release in case something like this happens.

The worst part isn’t that he didn’t score any distance on this attempt but rather his poor form.

Good thing he wore the full-face helmet.

We’ll call this one the “Atomic Wedgie” as a tribute to his skis.

Now that’s a tomahawk!

“Oi, yoi, yoi, yoi!”

This can’t be legal under current F.I.S. regulations.

Not sure where to go with this critique. Note the Grateful Dead in the background, the fact that this was uploaded and presumably shot by someone named Georgia Peach, and lastly, the realization that this would have been much worse had the jumper opted for the 120m launch instead of merely the 90m.

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Comments

  • edelweiss

    God skiers are idiots..

  • Jano Pelti

    Awesome! But you forgot one of the best; http://vimeo.com/22942427
    No spandex though..

  • chron bugg

    God Shaun White is a faggot. Since he is a snowboarder that most mean all snowboarders are faggots

  • Eric

    My knees hurt just from watching all of these. Screw that! haha

  • Jenise

    Summer snowboarding- good times
    Summer ski jumping- looks horrible and not fun at all

  • wtf

    What is the point of this? Hating on guys doing what they love? This shit looks fucking intense, and the slams look painful (even horrific), yet you guys still make fun of them? I mean I can understand bagging on Jacobellis for being an idiot, but these skiers are on some next level shit.

    Either way, all this skier vs. snowboarder shit is so fucking lame. The only people I know that actually bag on skiers are kooks. 2 planks or 1 plank, who gives a shit.

    Edelweiss is a fuckin idiot by the way.

  • jorgemontoya

    that was great, had never seen the jacobellis agony of defeat moment until now…a real mood lifter

  • Mitch

    I’ve met a lot of asshole skiers. That being said, I’ve met a lot of asshole snowboarders. The feud is pointless. Let’s fight over something else, like non-murders vs murders. At least that’s more of an argument….

  • Sev

    Farrell and Hinkley are both gods, proctor duo

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